Stay
by Crimson Vixen
Summary: IkkiKazu. a little more serious than my other fics. Kazu wants to follow Ikki to his next battle, but the crow won't let him. oneshot?


**A/N: **What can I say, I'm just on a Ikkazu streak as of late. Folly and Sin is well on it's way, for those of you that read it. I have to keep up the IkkiKazu fics around here because I still don't think there's anywhere near enough of it. I hope to see more from you all in the future as well, kay!? Heheh, anyway, here's just another little piece I did in like, five minutes.

It's a little more serious and I guess darker than my other fics. But for those of you that care to know, once Folly and Sin gets going, the feel of it will be something like this story right here. Enjoy!

**Warnings: **I think I dropped one F bomb but other than that, I think we're good.

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**Air Gear**

_a fiction by Crimson Vixen_

Stay

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"I don't want you to be there."

God it hurt. Those words sliced into Kazu's heart like a hot knife through butter. Ikki spoke in such a solid tone, in a way that sounded so very, very final.

They lay on the rooftop, arms folded under their heads as they gazed at the night sky. The stars were hard to see with all the lights, but the moon was still bright. Kazu craned his neck to face Ikki and stare at his profile. The crow looked so damn serious, and it wasn't as though Kazu had never seen Ikki serious before. He'd seen practically all of Ikki's moods, but today just seemed… different.

Cold.

"Why?" It was the only word his mouth could form. He felt so weak, so childish, tears threatening to fall. His throat burned with all the words he held back. His vision blurred. "Why can't I go with you?"

"Don't be stupid," Ikki mumbled, refusing to return Kazu's stare. He blinked heavily, lips thinning momentarily. He took a rather large breath and sighed softly. "You already know why."

But that was just it. Kazu did know why, and that's what hurt the most. But he needed to hear it to really believe it. Did that make sense?

The silence was agonizing. The air seemed like it got a little colder. Kazu sat up quickly, making himself dizzy in the process. He folded his elbows over his knees and stared down at the roof tiles. After his thoughts settled a little, his voice rose into just a whisper in the wind.

"I promise I won't get in the way."

Another minute passed before Ikki was sitting up too, still refusing to look at him. As if looking at him would only complicate things.

"Don't make this harder than it has to be, dude," the crow said, hands balling into loose fists. "You know it has nothing do with that."

"Doesn't it though?" Kazu replied quietly, head shrinking into his folded arms. He knew he was letting his emotions get the best of him. His voice grew muffled in the fabric. "Do you think me being there will screw up your chances?"

"Yes."

Kazu bit his lower lip, hard. Why was he doing this? He'd never felt so stupid as a tear finally won the battle and rolled down his cheek. He knew it, he'd always known it! He was worthless, he was nothing, he would only bring Ikki down if he tagged along. Had he always felt this way? Why was he bringing it up now? Kazu hid his face the rest of the way into his arms, pulling his knees closer to his body at the same time. Balling into himself, in a way. Protecting himself.

Stupid, _stupid_!

There was a shuffle of fabric and Ikki let himself fall onto his back again, grabbing Kazu by the back of his sweatshirt and pulling him down as well. And Kazu hit the roof with a quiet thud, arms falling at his sides and face twisted into self hate and poignancy as if he just didn't have the _strength _to shield himself. And he really didn't. Did Ikki care at all that he was right next to him, face red with grief? Couldn't he tell he was hurting? Or maybe he just didn't care, since he was the one that did the hurting in the first place.

Oh God…

Then, out of seemingly nowhere, Kazu felt Ikki's hand creep into his own and squeeze it tightly. He forced himself to look over at Ikki but the boy was _still_ looking at anything but him.

He'd never been so fucking confused in his life.

"Don't you understand?" Ikki near growled. "This is no ordinary team. They'll do anything to win."

Kazu sniffed lightly, ripping his eyes away from the other boy and back to the moon. Just focus on the moon, and maybe things will be easier. He concentrated on the shadows and the way it glowed so egotistically, and rightfully so.

"I can't bring you with me because – " Ikki cut himself off short and seethed through his teeth. His voice grew harder than Kazu had ever heard it. "I just can't."

"I'm done holding you back," Kazu managed, tired, and tried to sit up again, but Ikki yanked him back down, and this time, he looked at him. Really looked at him. The crow grinded his teeth.

"If you come along, they'll just use you against me!" He said in one breath, words bunched together and voice so unlike him.

And all Kazu could do was stare, and blink, and stare some more. Did Itsuki Minami's voice just shake? Lately Ikki had been acting cold and distant and it was hard to understand what was going through his head. And it wasn't easy to get him to freely admit his fears, but, well, Kazu figured he'd gotten pretty damn close. Part of him was flattered, while part of him was petrified.

Ikki didn't want him to come because… because he was trying to protect him. He wanted to leave tomorrow, _alone_, and expected him to faithfully sit behind and count the minutes to his return.

"Ikki, I want to stay by your side and support you," he paused to laugh at how corny he sounded but continued anyway. "No matter what the risk."

And this is the way things had been lately between them, ever since things had grown a little serious. Ikki had been all the more cautious since their first kiss, and now Kazu finally understood why.

"I'm not having any of it," Ikki muttered, grabbing a fistful of Kazu's hair and pulling him in for a rough kiss. When he pulled away, leaving Kazu breathless, he stood up, and broke the other boys heart by once again avoiding eye contact. "Make sure you're here when I get back."

And with that, he left. Kazu returned to a sitting position, finding he didn't have the strength to chase after him. Like Ikki left and took his ability to do so. He looked back up to the moon with a mournful expression. It was hard for him to find the line between strength and weakness. Because he wondered if that with the strength Ikki and him gave each other, if it all ended up being just another weakness in the end.

He didn't want to think about it. Ikki didn't want him to follow, but as much as Kazu loved the other boy, he couldn't make any promises.


End file.
